Nearing the End of a Generation

I have been very lucky during my life to be surrounded by family. Unlike so many, I have always been blessed with three generations in my daily life. Now that I have children, we are up to four generations! It's quite remarkable and I know for certain that I am a better person as a result. I realize that lots of people feel lucky to know their grandparents, never mind their great-grandparents and great aunts and uncles.

Sadly, the last of my grandmother on my father's side siblings died last week. Aunt Esther (my great-aunt) was 92 years old and had been a part of every holiday and special event that I have celebrated my entire life.

We feel very fortunate to have had her with us for as long as we did. Her 92 years were lived simply and in good health. She was a strong woman who lived a fairly solitary life. She lived in the same house for all 92 years! Many changes occurred in that house over time. Babies were born, tragedies broke hearts, and the residents that lived with her changed several times. It was the family home from the time that their parents immigrated to the United States and was a functioning farm when her parents were alive. I don't remember it ever being a farm in my lifetime but my father has many great memories of days spent doing chores, turning farm animals into pets (that did not end well), and playing with his many cousins all over the land. My earliest memories are of Aunt Esther and Aunt Rose living in the house. Neither of them ever married, though Rose had a man that she was very much in love with, but was unable to get her father's permission to marry him. We often jokingly referred to the two of them as the Baldwin Sisters from the Walton's, though I can be positive that the two of them were not making moonshine in a back room. It was a gathering place for family and visiting them on Sunday mornings after church was something I absolutely loved to do. We could always count on them to buy from us when we were selling Girl Scout cookies or doing fundraisers for school. They loved us as much as our grandparents did and we knew it.

It's difficult to comprehend that my grandmother is the only member of her family left. I can't even imagine how hard that is for her. During the course of my lifetime she has lost 3 sisters and a brother. Other siblings had also died before I was born. It takes an incredibly strong person to keep carrying on as pieces of your life and history are taken from you year after year. The Ladzinski Family has been in our town for over 100 years and I know how grateful we should be, and I am, for the time we have had with them all, but it's still so hard to let go of what has always been.

The years to come will continue to bring changes for us all. The house will likely change hands, but hopefully will stay in the family somehow. We will have to create occasions to get together with the extended family because the heart of our connection has now been lost. I know personally that I am not willing to let go. I will make a point to stay in touch and make plans to gather us together. Even though our lives are all busy, we need to do it for those that are gone. They would want that for us. We may not be able to gather where we always did, but the place is not as important as the connection we all need to feel to one another. We are the newest generation and we must carry on.

Our Recent Days: Instagram Style

We just haven't had much excitement around here lately. Evan stayed home from school sick today and Maggie is acting weird so she may not be far behind. Oh the joy. I wanted to post some of my favorite Instagram pictures from lately for two reasons: 1- I'll have them saved in one more place, and 2- this way Roman gets to see them because he's a caveman and doesn't use any social media.

A jammie day over the weekend. 

Crazy kids highlighting what makes each one of them unique. 

A snowy day on Monday. I love the picturesqueness of New England.

Evan can be sick, but he still has to beat the next level of his sword fight game on the Wii.

My pigtail girl!

My Kids are Parrots

First of all, and completely unrelated to this post, I was just thinking about how I should really pay more attention to the weather. Apparently it's supposed to get yucky around here later and I had no idea. I tend to take the weather as it comes, unless it's a hurricane, because I will ALWAYS be first in line to buy water and batteries in the case of a hurricane. Seriously. But anyway, as I was noticing that there were already cancellations and early dismissals being posted I thought "hmm.. I wonder when it will start". As it turns out, it already did. I could have saved myself a whole thought by simply looking out the window. Yet another lesson learned. Check.

Now back to the fact that my kids are parrots. Maggie not so much because she can't say a whole lot yet, but she is VERY good at mimicking tone. As in reprimanding her brothers in a growly voice. Not that we ever need to yell at our children because they are so full of "listening ears" and respect all the time. But on the chance that we may raise our voices, or heaven forbid for them, lower them (that is the worst possible sign that I am not just a little angry with you, but a lot) she's right on it. She'll stand at the top of the stairs and call them to dinner too which is hilarious to listen to. She is really progressing in her language so it's super cute to see what words she chooses to try.

Evan has come leaps and bounds with his speech in the last few months. We will have him evaluated this spring because I know he needs it, but for now we (his family) can understand most of what he says. He is my most vocal parrot. I will ask him to do something and he very nonchalantly responds with "in a minute". Hmm.. sounds familiar. He loves to watch Wipeout and it is on TruTV a couple of nights a week. If you've ever seen that channel you know that Wipeout is the only show on it that is remotely appropriate for children. So whenever Evan is checking to see if it's on and it isn't I'll hear "Nope. Can't watch that. It's an adult show. We don't watch adult shows. Need to change the channel".

Braeden likes to be in charge so he is most likely to be telling the other two what to do. "If you don't finish your supper Evan, you don't get dessert. Sorry". If he's in the middle of something, "I'll help you when I'm done". Such a mini-adult sometimes. He's also become quite liberal with his use of "in a minute". I used to do everything they asked when they asked so that I could be a great mom. (laugh, it's okay) Then I started realizing I couldn't indulge them immediately all the time, so I started saying, "in a minute" and "I'll help you when I'm done".. Sounds familiar. I knew it would come back to get me.

A Different Kind of Productive

January has been a joyful month for us so far; Roman has a new job, Braeden is getting a handle on reading, we've been doing lots of sledding and things have been going along nice and smoothly. I haven't taken many pictures at all because life has been rather status quo, which is great, but doesn't create a lot of picture taking opportunities. Jen and I decided to take a couple of months off of sign making before we go nuts getting ready for the spring craft fair season so I've found myself doing something fairly unusual these days.. watching tv. Not only have I caught up on some of my DVR'd favorites, but I've watched complete seasons of a couple of different shows that I had heard about but never seen.

I saw so much buzz on Twitter and Facebook a few weeks ago when the third season of Downton Abbey was about to premiere that I had to see it for myself. Roman and I started watching it and were instantly hooked. We watched seasons 1 and 2 in two weeks and are now caught up to the episodes that are currently airing. What can be better than smug British Aristocrats who deplore people who violate old traditions and traitorously go to the United States? The grandmother on the show is worth watching for; she is hilarious.

When Jen and I were working before Christmas we would sometimes catch up on On Demand episodes of Revenge that she had missed. I had never seen it before and it is definitely not a show that you can jump into in the middle. There are way to many plot lines and characters to not have the background from the start of the series. I'm almost caught up to current episodes and I can't get enough. I don't watch soap operas during the day, but this is certainly close to that with lots of rich people, murders, alcohol and deception. Makes for some interesting watching.

My last new time-consuming activity isn't a tv show, but sure is addicting. Erin told me about Candy Crush Saga and oh my goodness do I spend far too much time playing this game.

I have made it to level 30 so far and it's a pretty mindless way to pass the time. Thank you January for giving me the chance to veg out a little and take some down time. I wouldn't really call what I've been doing productive, but it's been entertaining and helped me to catch a few deep breathes that I had been desperately needing. 

Another BIG Day in Our House

Tonight before bed Braeden asked me to read him the book he had taken out of the library at school this week.

I know he's been working hard learning to read this year so I asked him if he wanted to read it to me instead. Usually he says no because he gets frustrated trying, but tonight was different. He agreed and then READ ME THE BOOK!! I had to help with some of the bigger words, but he followed the story with his finger and sounded out the words that he was unsure of. Oh my goodness! I am so excited for him. He has always been a big lover of books, but now a whole new world is beginning to open up for him since he will be able to read the early reader books to himself. Even if he doesn't know all the words, he will understand the general idea. Yay! What an exciting week we're having. I am a very proud Momma tonight.

Great News!

Roman is starting a new job next week! To say we are excited about this turn of events would be the biggest understatement. We are elated that he is finally going to be fulfilling his dreams as a high school math teacher. It's been a long road to get here, but his persistence has paid off and he will be joining the faculty at Franklin County Technical School on Monday. For the last few years he has been working in a neighboring town as a teacher assistant. It kept him in the school environment while he continued his search for a teaching position. I am so proud of him and I know it will do enormous things for his confidence and self-worth. We're looking forward to the many changes that will come from this transition.

Go Eagles!

Hello 2013

Anyway you look at it, whether you are happy 2012 is over and looking forward to a new start or hoping for even better things in the future, 2013 is here! It's so hard to believe that another year has come to a close. I feel like we were all just curiously waiting to see if anything would come of Y2K. Well, it's officially 13 years later and we're all still here. I for one enjoyed 2012 as a year of new experiences and successes. While not everything I had hoped to accomplish came to fruition, I did put a lot of building blocks in place for the future. For that I am incredibly thankful.

I don't like to make resolutions because I feel like it simply sets me up to feel like a failure when I don't achieve the success I thought for a fleeting moment that I might. Lose weight? Yeah sure, that's a great goal, but it's not something I can bang my head over because honestly if I wanted to seriously commit to that, I would, no matter what time of the year it is.  I could resolve to give up certain foods, but then I would crave them the minute the statement was out of my mouth. I'm pretty sure that would help me GAIN weight.

So as we wander into a new year, I plan to try to focus on certain things, but not commit to 100% success because we all know that is an invitation to feel inadequate. Here goes:

1. Maintain last year's momentum of building myself into a more out-going and happier person. Last year was wonderful for me with lots of new friendships made and a much busier calendar for everyone in our family. It was hard sometimes, but wonderful for my soul.
2. Kick PPD's butt once and for all. I have been stumped by the control PPD has had over me this time around. While it was severe before I became aware of it with Braeden, it has been persistent this time and I'm hopeful that in 2013 I can say goodbye for good!
3. Gain control over the out-of-control feeling that is floating around me all the time. This includes getting a better handle on my house, our schedule and the consistency used when dealing with the kids. My guess is that this one will be the one out the window first..
4. SLEEP MORE. Please Lord, let me get this one right! I know I need more sleep but I have a terrible time getting myself to go to bed before 11:00 because I like the time while the kids are asleep to breathe and not be climbed on for a while. I've been trying to get to bed by 10:30 each night and I can already feel a difference in my energy in the morning. 

Here we go 2013. Let's see what you've got!